Tag Archives: musician

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Current Status: Nailed It!

What a week…

I have to write about my girls and motherhood while I’m flying high. As many mothers out there know, that feeling could be gone in an instant by a tantrum, bad grade or much worse. Today however, I feel good. I actually feel great. If I had time to share all of the turmoil currently swirling in the outskirts of my life, it may surprise you that I’m doing well, it actually surprises me. God is good.

At a very young age I began to pray for strength. Not new clothes or a new toy, just strength. And still today, when I sit with God, I pray for my family and for continued strength. Again and again, my prayers have been answered. 

Being a mother of three young girls (insert any number of children and gender) is difficult. My experience isn’t different than most other mothers. You want the best for your children, you do the best you can for your children. 

I used to think that I would have this large village, as they say, of people that would help me raise my girls into exceptional young women. I thought they would have role models at every corner, aunts to teach them this, uncles to teach them that, grandparents, great aunts, cousins and friends. I thought they would be surrounded by love and support and knowledge and wisdom. The truth is not everyone believes in that village mentality. While they do have family that love them, encouraging people to take an active role in their growth and development isn’t easy. People are busy with their own lives and priorities. 

My solution; be the village, pray for the strength and be grateful for the help of a few others. 

Within the last year my girls have all had exceptional teachers. We are so grateful for them. They have taught them above and beyond the classroom. These women have shown actually care and concern and we are blessed to have such wonderful women in their lives. 

Another blessings, friends with time. I’ve had a friend take the time to teach my girls through art. My girls are smart but also creative. It meant the world to me to have someone spend time with them, especially Sofia. 

Then there’s my husband and myself. We are the village. 

I have structured my life in a way that although difficult, allows me to be the type of mother I want to be. After such a busy but successful week, I had to celebrate. 

Disclaimer: I celebrate after a successful day!

My week consisted of 2 consulting proposals, a university  workshop, performance with my band, work due for a new client and a planning meeting for my organization. My husbands consisted of working 40 hours+ of construction, partnering with me with the workshop and performance and 2 DJ gigs of his own. Despite the workload, by weeks end, we were a family accomplished. My oldest daughter and I have been working together for the past few weeks to bring her lower grades up. By Friday? Straight A’s. My middle daughter has been working for weeks getting ready for her class musical. She struggles with her speech and gets a little shy on stage. We worked together, she’s worked very hard. The result? A Stellar performance! My youngest daughter is living the life but my two goals for her are to become a little more mature (less breakdowns) and to learn to read by the end of summer. We have been working very hard on both of those. This week? Minimal breakdowns, more talking through issues and…she read a sentence we made with her new fancy flash cards! We did it! Lo hicimos! 

How can we not celebrate?  I feel so good. In addition to their own accomplishments, my daughters also see me succeeding and helping others. I know I am a great example for them, I work really hard to be. 

I feel so proud. Proud of my girls, proud of my husband and proud of myself. Current status is indeed, Winning!

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Why I Do What I Do

This photo by Gordon Parks is so beautiful to me. Every time I see it I stop and ponder. So many thoughts run through my mind. The pain and beauty is awe inspiring. Although it’s sad, to me, it’s also very powerful. 

This past weekend, my husband and I had a chance to spend a few hours together for a quick lunch. Time alone is a little rare. When we get some time together usually chat about our girls, catch up on businesses items and make plans based on some short or long term goals. We also laugh a lot and exchange our funniest stories from the prior week. As we shared some funny stories about our girls, the conversation shifted to their future and my goals for them. The conversation shifted. I then told my husband something I had unintentionally never shared with him before…the burden I carry. I know burden is such a deep and heavy (literally) word, but it is the truest description of what I feel. 

I am responsible for many things. My family, our home, my business,etc. More importantly, I am responsible for raising three girls into women. I carry the burden of raising strong, independent women that are kind, empathetic and emotionally intelligent, among a plethora of other traits. In order to do so I have to provide a solid foundation, be present and continuously supportive. That requires an all-day every-day mentality and focus. There is never a time I am not thinking about that responsibility. I carry the burden of those that have come before me. My parents, and the sacrifices they made to bring my sisters and I to the United States and make a wonderful life for us. I also carry the burden of the people who have fought for the rights of black people in this country and the Caribbean and those that continue to work hard to break down barriers and create change.

All of that I carry. It may sound like a lot but I am grateful for it. Knowing that without the sacrifices of so many I would not be here, able to do what I’m doing, is very humbling and yet inspiring. It’s the driving force behind my work ethic and mission to accomplish so many goals. There are too many people to let down, including myself. 

When people talk about their goals, but do nothing to reach them or don’t take time to do quality work. It confuses me. I am working for all of those that came before me, my girls, and all of the people that will follow. With that mindset, I consider everything I do to have great meaning and great impact. Therefore, I have no choice but to always work hard to reach excellence. When I think of my mother and her continued hard work, my father and his strive to do what he loves, the mothers and fathers that shielded their children from violence during the civil rights movement and the many, many lives lost fighting for freedom and justice around the world…with all that I have, and the opportunities I have been given, how can I waste that? How can I not achieve?

“Being a mess is just not an option!”

Before I was an entrepreneur, I spent many years in a management position. It was in this role that I learned about human behavior. Everyday, before work, I would review my job description and work towards achieving  every requirement of my position. I held myself accountable and focused on achieving every goal put upon our team. I put great pressure on myself and my team to succeed in our roles. I quickly realized that although I had that passion and drive for achievement, not everyone shared that philosophy. Many were completely okay with producing mediocre results.

Trying to understand their mindset was overwhelmingly difficult. I didn’t understand how there could be clearly placed goals set and someone not try their all to achieve it. I noticed they felt no pressure. No responsibility. Failure was an option and many people are okay with that. 

Well, I feel great pressure. When I look at my children, study our history, or speak with my parents. I feel great pressure. It’s my life’s work. There’s no work-life balance, just life. I work all day and all night. Whether it’s consulting, performing, or teaching my daughter to read. Nothing is optional. I do it all. It all matters. Yesterday, today and tomorrow. What you choose to do and what you choose not to do. It all matters. So I will continue to work hard for the people of the past, the people I share this present with, and the people that will come after I’m gone. And, because of my passion and the work I choose to do, I will always feel accomplished. 

Black History Month 2016