When someone loves my child, truly loves my child, I feel an overwhelming sense of joy. For me, when someone is kind to my children, shows them affection, shows them love and makes them feel special. I get speechless, overcome with emotion. I’m not sure why. I love my children, so much, too much (if that’s possible) but I don’t hold anyone else to that standard. Aunt, uncle, cousin, grandparent, Godparent, or friend, I don’t expect anyone to go out of their way for my children. Of course I would love for every one of my children’s relatives and all of our close friends to just surround my girls with love and support, but I know that’s not likely and may be a little too much to ask for. I’ve paid attention. I’ve seen how the world works, how relationships manifest and dissolve. Therefore love is not an expectation. Maybe I should expect it, but I don’t and because I don’t, I think I can truly appreciate when someone does show love and affection to my girls and how they receive and respond. Whether it’s friends that attend every party or an aunt that can make my girls feel loved from across the country, I truly appreciate their love.

I used to think that the so-called “village” that we hear so much about was a given. Aunts, uncles, cousins, whomever, would come from any and everywhere to love, guide and protect our children. As I’ve learned through my own experiences as well as the experiences of others, that’s not always the case. I will always be grateful to any relative or friend that has taken the time to be a part of my children’s lives, that’s taken the time to love and support them. In return, I also hope they feel the love and admiration my children have for them and cherish it. It’s truly a blessing.