This week, like most has been hectic. Meetings, proposals, 2HR delays, school closings, bitter cold, and the usual craziness of running a business and raising a family. The highlight? My daughter Stella receiving a scholarship for academic achievement for next school year. She’s only 7 years old, but we’re convinced this will the first of many. The weekend will be a little different than usual. This weekend, we’ll be celebrating our anniversary, we have some fun activities planned and are spending it without our girls.
This afternoon we’ll take the girls to spend the weekend with their nonnie and nonnuzzi. I purchased tickets for Startup Weekend Education. It may be surprising to some, but Startup Weekend has quickly become one of my favorite events since entering the tech scene, it was my first choice when deciding how we would spend our anniversary weekend. I’m excited to hear the pitches and see what ideas are chosen.
This will be an entire day without my girls. The first time I’m not out of town, but home, without children. I know I’m going to miss them but I am looking forward to it. I have decided that I won’t be doing any work, no; proposals, reviewing resumes, cooking, cleaning, laundry, nothing of the sort. My husband and I will just relax. Something we never get to do. I’m taking this day to re-energize, gather my thoughts and plan out the next few months.
Saturday evening we’ll trade in our lounge wear for a suit and fancy dress and head down to the Hotel Monaco. It’s my first time, I’m a little late to the party. My husband was one of the contractors on the project so he’s seen the ins and outs and excited to give me a tour.
This will not be the typical Sunday. No waking up at 6:00 am to clean and prep. Instead, I’ll be sleeping in…again! Church, then brunch to celebrate our actual anniversary. The big focus for the day after brunch will the nonprofit I started with my husband. We’re at a pivotal stage and have a list of tasks to accomplish. Sunday evening it’s back to Startup Weekend Ed. to see the final pitches. This is the best part. The conviction, team work and hard work that fills the room inspires me.
This weekend will be and feel much different than most. Sunday, February 22nd will mark our 12th wedding anniversary. We’re excited to celebrate our marriage and we’re proud we’ve made it this far. What makes us even more proud is the 15 years we’ve been together and the life we’ve built in that time. We’re a team, and I absolutely adore him.
Despite what some think (we sometimes get made fun of for this), we don’t always get along and we do argue, we just have a very strong bond and even stronger friendship. I used to wish that we had known each other from childhood. David would have definitely been my best friend.
We’ve been called, “too cute,” “lovebirds” and “all in all a great couple.” Such kind and humbling words. Those kind words mean so much to us. So much more that the person saying it could ever know. Our love needs encouragement, all love needs encouragement…and support. Marriage requires even more encouragement and support than we sometimes realize. I said before that I was proud of us for being together so long. It may sound strange, as though we’ve won some sort of award, but it’s true. I’m proud. Proud because marriage is difficult, really hard work, but I want and need my marriage to work. I love my husband and need him to be my husband.
Twelve years is a long time for anything. My mother asked the other day if this year would mark our twelfth anniversary, I responded, “Yes, didn’t you see the movie they made about us? It’s called, Twelve Years a Slave!” She didn’t laugh. I did! She really couldn’t believe it had already been 12 years since our wedding day.
Think about your life twelve years ago. How different were you? We were so different. So young. I was 23 years old. I knew a few things, not much, but I knew how to love. That was the easy part. After all, it’s so easy a child can do it. I never think about what I don’t know when it comes to love. It’s as natural as breathing. No one teaches you how to breathe, you just know. Think about any child you know and how they express love. My children, they hug me when I’m sad and stay by my side. They give me compliments, somehow knowing when I need one. They cheer me on and are my biggest fans. They surprise me with a beautiful drawing or painting specially made for me and they constantly say “I love you mommy.” The way they love is so similar to the way David and I love. Support, encouragement, unexpected kind gestures, loyalty, and constantly saying “I love you.” That’s what I need to feel loved, and that’s what I get. I’m a big believer that we should NOT follow the golden rule. Yes I said not. I believe we should treat others how they wanted to be treated. Not how we want to be treated. The same with love and relationships. We should love others how they want to be loved. How they need to be loved. Not how we want to be loved or want to love them. That kind of love, giving the other what they need when they need it, that’s what’s lead us through the past 12 years.
I am overjoyed, 12 years, 3 kids, 2 non-profits, 1 business, lots of love and endless hopes and dreams. Blessed and grateful and excited for what happens in the next 12…as long as it doesn’t go by too fast.
Enjoy the weekend.